Why I will never make to the US Open

and, why I'm thankful for holiday decorations.

Here's a picture of the hood over my stove.

   

I saw it in a magazine and had a copy made several years ago when we remodeled the kitchen. 

I stuccoed and painted it myself. (design is a decal)

You are probably thinking " what does this have to do with your tennis career"?

Well, my story begins with a trip to Target. I was perusing the outdoor living area when I spotted this.

It is a mosquito swatter.

We live in a heavily wooded area and during the months of June - September the mosquitoes are flying vampires, and can be the size of a  bumble bee. ( slight exaggeration)

I am definitley a gadget girl.

So, when i saw this, I thought... what a great idea...

how fun is this gonna be?

I'm  gonna get all Martina Navratilova on these blood suckers.

I got home, charged the thing  and said...

LET THE GAMES BEGIN!

It is evening and the blood suckers are buzzing the lights over the court

The spectators (the kids) are ready and waiting  for the action to begin.

Always ready to put on a show, I grab the handle  just like the pros do

I take off around the court (kitchen)

They spectators are yelling "There's one momma"!

I dove for it, giving it my best "swat"

WOOSH goes the racket

The zizzz, zizzz of frying bugs could be heard

the kids were cheering

I was overcome by the their applause

I wanted to give them more

So, I gave them a overhead slice

and a back handed right,

when suddenly

my WOOSH  

turned into

 CRASH!

pieces of the hoods stucco burst all over the kitchen!

the kids sat in stunned horror

For once I was actually speechless

Freeze

This is the part like in the movies where the camera freezes and a narrator comes in and narrates about what the person may or may not do next...

Unfreeze

I bust out laughing

What else was there to do?

The kids saw my reaction and they started laughing too.

 And that's the lesson really...

You might as well laugh about it, and learn to laugh at yourself while you're at it!

I learned that lesson about four years ago on Thanksgiving.

The fire extinguisher jokes have been going on for about a week now.

 

Go here and you can see why...

You might find it funny.

 Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Comments

[Marie]

This story is hysterical! The only thing that would make it funnier would be to see the "after " picture of the thing over the stove. PLEASE POST A PICTURE!

[carissa... brown eyed fox]

i loooooove it!
the humor... the fun... YOU!
yall i can imagine will have a great turkey day!

wanted to swing by... give a hug...
and wish yall a hAppY Thanksgiving! hope it's just super! ♥

[kim]

Happy Thanksgiving!

[Lanny Stanard]

You are to funny... hope everything turned out this year! also I just wanted you to know I removed your buttom on my blog only because it wasn't working right... It will be on again soon after Shawn can fix it for me! I just wanted you to know :) happy week-end.